July 11, 2014 (Smosh)
July 13, 2014 (El Smosh)

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Characters Featured:

Anthony, Sgt. Anous, Waiter, Date, Date's Twin Brother

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Anime Voice Swap

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My Morning Routine


Anthony's trip to the bathroom is such a disaster that it can only be retold in a musical montage!!!


The video begins by stating it was inspired by a sketch by Jimmy Fallon.

In Restaurant de Fancy, Anthony and a girl (Brittni Barger) talk about bowl rats when the waiter (Ian Hecox) suddenly gives Anthony a check. Anthony wonders if he's out on a date or are just friends with her while also noticing that she isn't reaching for the check thinking that it is a date. Anthony decides to go to the bathroom to check her Facebook status while lying to the girl saying that he's going to play Angry Turds in the bathroom.


Gotta step in the bathroom super fast
To check her current Facebook dating status
To see if this is a confusing friend-zone thing.
I don't want to pay if it's a friend-zone thing,
But I totally will if it's a make out thing!
Might make me seem like a jerk, but whatever.
This quick trip to the bathroom
Is the best idea ever!

Wait, it seems kinda weird to just be on my phone.
I should probably just fake that I'm using a toilet.
Should I fake a number one or a number two?
I'll fake a number one so
I won't have to drop my pants
And I'm kind of embarrassed about my SpongeBob undies.
On my phone, fake peeing...
"Holy s**t I'm clever!"
This quick trip to the bathroom
Is the best idea ever!

Oh crap, now that I'm at a urinal
I actually have to pee.
Do I aim at the back wall
Or at the urinal cake?
Great, now I'm kinda hungry for some cake.
And why is there always a random piece of
Gum in the bowl?
And where did that stray
Pubic hair come from?
Seriously, every time I use a urinal,
There's one in there.
Like, do people start losing their hair down there
Or did it get caught in someone's zipper and come out
Or did it- wait, why am I still talking about pubes? That's gross!
I got pee blowback on my pants!
They're ruined forever.
This quick trip to the bathroom
Might not be the best idea ever.

Out of nowhere, my foot gets tapped.
Maybe it's an accident and no big deal.
Gotta look over and see who did it.
Whatever I do, don't look at his junk.
Oh crap, I looked and he's into it.
Dammit, I looked again and he's even more into it.
I might've just got a boyfriend
Who will love me forever.
This quick trip to the bathroom
Is becoming the worst idea ever.

Gotta get away from Creepy Urinal Guy.
The guy next to me
Grunts like he's giving birth.
I play a game on my phone
To drown out the noise.
Oh man, I forgot Flappy Bird doesn't have music.
It smells like Shrek's dick in here.
I need to flee.
Gotta wash my hands
So they don't smell like pee.
What the hell?
"Employees must wash hands?"
I guess I have to wait for an employee to wash my hands.

Anthony: Uh, hello? I guess I need an employee. Are there any employees here?

Seriously man, making noise won't help.
I'm gonna leave a bad review on Yelp.
Just then my date runs to the urinal,
Lifts up her skirt
And starts peeing like a man! I guess my date is a dude -
I'm not all that clever.
This quick trip to the bathroom
Was the worst idea ever.

Then Creepy Urinal Guy confronts my date.
Anous: I totally knew you were cheating on me!
Anthony: So I guess that creepy guy is her boyfriend.
I'm super confused and it's only getting worse.
Then someone who looks exactly like my date walks in.
Anthony's date: That's my brother, my identical twin!
Anthony: All this crazy s**t is making my head spin,
So I pull out my gun and point it at them.
"I don't know which one of you I have to shoot!"
Anthony's date's brother: You don't have to shoot either of us!
Anthony: Yeah, I guess you're right... but...(shoots Sgt. Anous)

"Now I guess you're totally single."
Anthony's date's brother: The three of us should get naked and mingle.
Anthony: I had the twins pay the check.
I told you I was clever.
This quick trip to the bathroom
Was the best idea ever!


  • According to the beginning of the video, the song was inspired by Smosh's "homeboy" Jimmy Fallon.
  • Before the waiter gives Anthony the check, Anthony is talking to his date about the naked mole rat
  • The song part of the video was obviously filmed in live action settings, though through photos in a stop motion style.
  • Before the lyrics were removed when Anthony asks himself why he is still talking about pubes, the lyrics read "Or did it come with the urinal when they bought it?"
  • Who Anthony thinks is the "Creepy Urinal Guy" is actually Sergeant Anous
  • The man who grunts in a struggle to defecate is the waiter portrayed by Ian who gave Anthony his check.
  • The explicit version of the song is only available on Amazon, click here to download the explicit version
  • The song was put on iTunes on July 3rd, 2014. Download the song HERE.
  • Identical twins are always the same sex. A pair of twins that are a boy and a girl are called fraternal twins, not identical. Or maybe they were born Identical twins but one of them decided to become a transexual.
  • Ian voices the transexual twin.
  • Ian also put his pubic hair on the urinal.
  • This is the fourth bathroom/toilet related episode of Smosh.First being 2 GUYS 1 BATHROOM, second being MY BATHROOM SECRET, and third being STUCK IN A TOILET!.

Shut Up! Opening

I've never taken a nap in a restroom. SHUT UP!





Anthony Padilla as himself
Ian Hecox as the Walter and Sgt. Anous
Brittni Barger as Anthony's date and her twin


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