(Ian and Anthony are watching SpongeBob Squarepants)


Hey SpongeBob, you want another Krabby Patty?


Sure Patrick.  (laughs loudly)


Okay this show is stupid.  No one would like a burger that's been underwater; it'll be all soggy and disgusting.


It's just a cartoon!  Imagine how much cartoons would suck if they were realistic.


Ash: Hey hey!  Wanna see this cute, yellow rat animal that I caught and put in this small, little ball?

Gary: Sure.

(Ash opens the ball and finds Pikachu's dead)   



(The teacher talks gibberish and then speaks normal English)

teacher: Ah I'm just messing with you guys!  Those aren't even real words.

Captain Planet and the Planeteers

Kwame: Got a complete rainbow.

(The kids started talking about the rainbow until Captain Planet comes along)

Planet: Hey kids, wanna go save the planet?

Kwame: Haven't I seen you somewhere before?

In a flashback

Woman: Hey, I'm in the back! Come on in.

Planet: Hey, I-I brought the wine coolers and candy like you aszzed. (Saw Kwame)

Kwame: Why won't you have a seat right over there?

Planet: (flees) OH S**T!

South Park

Stan: (licks a bar of soap) HELE!  I'M SORRY MOM!  HELELELEL...

The Simpsons

Homer: Bart, take out the trash.

Bart: Eat my shorts!

Homer: Why you little!

(Homer strangles Bart making Bart choke and then Homer gets a twenty year arrest for child abuse)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

April: Ah, the evil Shredder's gonna get me! Help me Raphael!

(Raphael gives out a weak chirp)

Dragon Ball Z


Anthony: How many times have you tried this?

Ian: Over nine thousand.

Invader Zim

(The Smosh Crew doesn't know anything about Invader Zim, so they just showed a waffle with Gir in his dog costume on it)


He-Man: By the power of Greyskull, I am (lifts up his sword) HE-MAN!

guy: (walks pass He-Man) Gay bar's that way.

Inspector Gadget

Robber: Give me all of your money!

Gadget: Go go gadget web shooter!  (Shoots the web at the robber) Hahahaha!  (Stops shooting)

Robber: (Spits some of the web off) Go go gadget gun! 

(Shoots Gadget with the gun)

Scooby Doo! (Deleted)

Fred: So gang, who are we gonna catch today?

Shaggy: His name's The Jigsaw Killer; one time, he made cut off his foot with a saw and then disembowel his friend with a meat cleaver.  (Goes along)

(The others stay put)

Velma: Who wants ice cream?

Fred and Daphne: Me!

(The three left)

Doug (Deleted)

(Doug was talking on the phone)

Doug: I don't know. Let me see what Skeeter thinks. Hey Skeeter!

Skeeter: (comes along) Hey Doug! Bark-bark.



Ian: Okay so, maybe cartoons would suck if they were real.

Anthony: See.

Ian: Alright well, I'm gonna go fire up some bigass (bigass is burgers in a bad Australian accent) on the grill. (Stands up)

Anthony: Some what?

Ian: You know, bigass. I'm saying it with a Steve Irwin accent.

Anthony: Like an Australian accent?

Ian: What the hell is that?

Out in the backyard

(Ian grilled a hamburger, smelled it, tripped on Shredder, and threw it in a bucket of water)

Ian (thoughts): No one would like a burger that's been underwater...

(Ian takes the burger out of the bucket and eats it)

Ian: (yells out) THIS IS AMAZING!