September 17, 2010 (Smosh)
May 16, 2012 (El Smosh)

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Characters Featured:

Ian, Anthony, Ian's mom, eyepatch guy

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"EVIL FORTUNE COOKIE!" is a Smosh video uploaded on September 17, 2010.


Ian's fortune cookie accurately predicts the future.


Ian and Anthony are eating Chinese food, when Ian finishes and starts to open his fortune cookie. Anthony says it is not the way to open a fortune cookie and breaks his open with a knife. Ian says that it's dangerous, only for Anthony to reply, "Danger is my middle name."

Suddenly, a guy with an eyepatch comes in the house and says to Anthony, "Give me all your milk!" Anthony asks who he is, only for the guy to pull him closer, smelling his cheek, saying he can smell the milk. Freaked out, Anthony tells him the milk is in the fridge. The guy thanks him by kissing him. He then takes the milk out of the fridge and starts to drink it from the container as he leaves the house. Ian comments on how weird it was. Anthony asks, "Which part? The fact that some guy just stole our milk or the fact that he kissed me?" Ian says that wasn't either of Anthony's guesses, but the that his fortune cookie predicted that he'd meet a guy with an eyepatch.

The next day, Ian and Anthony were eating Chinese food again when Anthony comments on how Ian's fortune cookie accurately predicted the eyepatch guy's arrival the day before. Ian opens his cookie, only to find something shocking in his cookie, prompting him to tell Anthony, "Get the shovel." Outside, Anthony is digging a hole, feeling like there's nothing there. However, Ian discovers a treasure chest that's buried underground. At first he thinks it's an ancient language impinted on the chest, until Anthony turns it right side up for it to be read correctly. The chest reads, "Blackbeard's Secret Treasure." Ian opens it up to find a large diamond ring and several other pieces of jewelry. Ian and Anthony get excited about becoming rich off their treasure.

The next day, Ian and Anthony are eating Chinese food yet again, this time wearing some of the jewelry that they found the day before and Ian wearing a crown. Anthony excitedly waits for Ian to finish his food so he can open his fortune cookie. However, Ian grows shocked and tells that the fortune says that Ian and Anthony get married. Anthony is shocked by this and Ian remarks that the other two fortunes came true. Anthony says that it's just a fortune cookie, but Ian says that everything that has happened has been a fortelling of a prophecy, thinking that it's all meant to be. Ian then proposes to Anthony, who leaves in disgust saying, "You need help." Ian yells, "Fine! I would've just divorced you anyway!" before crying.

In the end, it is revealed that there is a hidden camera behind one of the plants. In another room, Ian's Mom is frustrated that her plan has failed. She asks the eyepatch guy about how to make money for her website now, then starts to regret making a billboard that advertises it. The website Ian's Mom was trying to advertise was

Alternate Scene #1

After Ian said that he'll meet a guy with an eyepatch, he also said that the kissing part turned him on a little bit.

Alternate Fortunes


Ian says that Anthony was adopted.


Ian says that Megan Fox is an alien.


Ian says that he hates Anthony.


Ian says that Justin Bieber is actually a lesbian.


Ian says that he is actually dead.

Alternate Scene #2

After Ian said that he'll meet a guy with an eyepatch, he also said that the kissing part was weird and sexy which made Anthony agreed and giggle.




  • Typing in in the URL would bring you to the extras for this video
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  • When Ian and Anthony find the treasure, the price tag for the treasure chest can be seen on the bottom.
  • When the guy first drinks out the milk jug and leaves, you can see the Legend of Zelda Triforce of Courage as a magnet on Anthony and Ian's refrigerator.
    • Also on the fridge is the photo that was shown in Santa is Real!, which was Ian's character (in said video) Stephen's "proof" of the existence of the Easter Bunny.
  • The second time Anthony and Ian eat Chinese takeout, Ian refers to his first fortune cookie as "pretty firetruckin' weird", a reference to the video FIRETRUCK!!!!
  • Because of this video, many people called Anthony "Anthony "Danger" Padilla" and for years it was put as his official middle name in his Smosh wikia entry.

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